By Esih Efuru
During a recent trip back home, I strolled through the train station, admiring the vendors and the familiar wave of hasty pedestrians. As I entered the waiting room, a heaviness gripped me that I couldn’t shake. I blinked, and then paused to gather myself. Then it hit me. I went back inside and stood in front of the huge schedule display. Before I knew it, my eyes became full with tears.
Almost twenty years earlier, in this same room on a rainy December Saturday evening, I sat, lonely, tired and depressed with nowhere to go. I’d recently earned a B.A. but was unemployed. I’d recently returned home but was homeless. I’d made a load of friends at Rutgers, but was now alone. I’d resorted to club hopping, riding empty trains at night, and resting in the waiting room in the daytime, where I could feel the constant motion of humanity and fight the urge to take my life.
Life hadn’t turned out the way I planned. I had it all figured out: I’d attend college, get amazing grades, and graduate with the dream job, with friends and love happily waiting for me. My plan failed. I had all of the potential in the world, so how did I end up with such a bad break?
I needed God’s help, and the next morning, I petitioned for it desperately. God answered, and that prayer was the start of a new life. I never looked or went back.
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Story continues after photo gallery.
As we make our way in this world, we won’t always know or like how the cards are played. Instead of getting stuck and losing vision, we must pause, breathe deep, and seek God for the strength to keep it moving. We are equipped, within our experiences, with all of the answers, tools and the support to get to the next level of learning. We’re never promised a sneak peek or a smooth ride, but we are promised growth and wisdom, if we look closely at how our circumstances are connected and press forward. What we can trust is that what’s to come is better than what has been.
The Apostle Paul declared that in order to claim his reward, he needed to press forward toward his goals. His faith in God and the future proved rewarding for him, and can be just as rewarding for us. Your present is full of seeds for your future. Look at the fertile land of your life and decide what you will sow. It can happen when, how and if you want to, if you’re willing to look ahead.
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Just before my sister arrived, I peeked back at the waiting area. I smiled in gratitude for the healing, breakthrough and elevation that occurred in the years following my desperate prayer. Each step taught me about God’s careful love and his intentions for me to become great. Though the journey was weighted and colorful, I wouldn’t trade anything for it. I now embrace a life of wisdom and favor with humility. The power of God, the power of prayer and the power of love pushes me forward into my destiny, and I’m enjoying the ride!
Esih Efuru, a 43 year old writer, artist and minister, is raising a daughter in Charlotte, NC. Email her esihefuru@gmail.com
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